I realized I needed those green pastures, those quiet waters. My soul needed restored. I didn't know how to do it. I was spent.
After church and Sunday School were finished Shannon and I spent the afternoon at the Wall Ranch. We had a lovely dinner of ranch-raised beef and potatoes and pie. And then it was me and Shannon on the 4-wheeler together following Harold around as he led us on a tour of part of his ranch. We went for miles. We saw one of the Wall's herds of cows. We saw wild flowers. We saw and smelled fresh cut alfalfa. We saw stock dams full of water. We saw green grass knee high! It was 75 degrees and sunny and still. I held onto Shannon as he drove. I put my head on his shoulder. We talked a bit. Mostly I just soaked in all the beauty. And it was absolutely beautiful. The land in that part of South Dakota is so wide. You can see for miles and miles. There are hills and valleys. There aren't a lot of trees but it is a beauty that grows on a person. As we drove to their home on the ranch before lunch the beauty overwhelmed me. I had never had cut across the land before. I had always just been on the highway. And as we drove around it just kept overwhelming me. God drenched me with His beauty, His peace and His joy.
Now that it is Tuesday I think I need more. My inner reserves are shallow these days. But the Great Shepherd is faithful. He is faithful to all. Just ask. Just listen. His sheep hear His voice and follow. He knows where He's leading us. Let Him lead. Let Him have control. Trying to control life is exhausting and not a job we were equipped to handle.
(BELOW IS THE POST FROM YESTERDAY)
Honest, I love my kids, all six of them (plus, my two grown stepsons). But sometimes in the summer I get a bit overwhelmed with being with them 24 hours a day. It's not like I don't want to be with them. I am just one of those introverts who gets recharged when there is peace and aloneness. That is hard to come by the in the middle of summer.
Yesterday while travelling to Ziebach county on the Cheyenne River Reservation with my husband I was worn out. I felt frustrated. My husband asked me what was wrong. I couldn't tell him. I just didn't know. Sometimes when we are filled with feelings that are negative we have to just give God time to show us what is really going on. And right before we crossed the Missouri I said, "I miss Sue and Maggie."
Sue was my friend who would come over and drink coffee with me and we'd talk about how great Jesus is and chat about living for Him and stuff like that. We could whoop and holler about Him and it would be just fine. And Maggie was my sweet sweet girl who loved to hang out with Mom and chat. She had to be the most non-demanding child God has ever created.
I realized neither Sue nor Maggie drained me emotionally. That's why I was missing them yesterday.
Peole will drain you and you will drain them at times. But then sometimes they can help fill you up and you can fill them up. Life can be intense.
So where's My Great Shepherd?
He was right there all the time. He saw that I needed those green pastures and quiet waters when I didn't see it. And He took me there.