I had one of those days today. It was going so slow I found time to make a chocolate cake, homemade bread and homemade pizza with mushrooms, sausage and onions cooked just right (and I still watched time meander sloth-like over my brain) on a fairly warm August day.I also did laundry on the line, dishes, read to Hawk three times and took a trip to Dupree to pick up Megan from practicie. (Still the day wore on).
I'm presently reading One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp. It was very popular when it first came out in 2010 and for a while afterward (maybe it's still popular -- I don't know). . And it is a very good book so far (she's very poetic), but tonight I'm feeling like a heel because Voskamp is one of those Christian moms who homeschools all her children. I know. We all have different gifts but there's a tiny part of me that thinks I should have wanted to homeschool all my children because that's what Christians do. But I never desired to homeschool my kids (I homeschool Hawk because of his disabilities and seizures but he's the only one I ever wanted to homeschool. I homeschooled my oldest daughter for a couple of weeks and that lasted for about a day -- no, for about an hour). I"m one of those parents who likes when summer comes to an end (except this summer means I lose my husband too because he's now a teacher...though that also means I got to spend tons of time with him this summer because he now has summers off).
I'm wrong to think of myself as a heel in comparison to another person (we should never compare ourselves to other humans -- it does no one any good). Like I said above, we all have different gifts. We all have different lives to live. Tonight, I'm a football widow. My husband also is a football coach now, and tonight he's at a football game. The kids and I stayed home and watched an Audrey Hepburn movie (we'll be at next week's game). Last night we watched Breakfast at Tiffany's. Why I think it's a good thing for my kids to watch these classic movies I don't know. I do know they loved the homemade pizza and the chocolate cake. Tomorow they'll have some of the homemade bread.
I read a book recently called Well: Healing our Beautiful and Broken World from a Hospital in West Africa by Sarah Thebarge. Thebarge's book takes us on her personal journey in her reactions and respnoses to life in Africa as she serves as a P.A. at a hospital in Togo for three months. At the end of the book she realizes reaching out to your neighbor in America is just as important as saving someone in Togo.
Where we are is where we are supposed to be. You aren't in your place by accident. God's got a reason for putting you there even if you didn't choose where you're at. This life isn't accidental.
I'm making notes for a new writing project. I'm not sure what way it's going to go really, but I can tell it's being birthed in me and it gives me a sense of purpose. Cause even though I'm not a financially successful writer, I'm still a writer at heart and every writer needs a project to feel like herself. That goes for you too. What are you? Are you using yout gifts for God? Cause the world needs you to. You need you to. Everyone you know needs you to use those gifts. It doesn't matter if it feels like those gifts don't matter much. We aren't in this for feelings. Just take my word for it -- you and your gifts matter. We need you. We need your gifts. So, back to the question -- what are you?