Often, it's not about the words.
Often, it's about how the words are said and who is saying those words.
Last night in my house a couple of people I dearly love got angry at each other. The first said something that wasn't really any big deal but the second reacted strongly and things went downhill from there. I did what I could but the second party wasn't happy and the first party wasn't happy either.
I was thinking about it this morning. I prayed about it. I was writing about it and reading my Bible. And what came to mind was this (and it will be so simple to many of you): the reason why the second party reacted so strongly was because she really wanted the approval and acceptance of the first party. And when the first party seemed to not approve of what she did, she felt rejected and consequently lashed out.
No one wants to be rejected. No one wants to feel belittled. And sometimes even if those feelings aren't there -- we aren't being rejected; we aren't being belittled -- we think we are and react to what we think is there. And then the person who we are saying is rejecting us is then angry because that person wasn't doing anything of the sort.
Big time misunderstandings.
I dare say misunderstandings are the reason for most of the pain in relationships.
We all want to be loved for just being us. We all want to be given the benefit of the doubt.
You know, I believe we do this all the time with God. We pray about something and things get worse. Or we experience something negative and interpret it wrongly. We tell ourselves God must not be pleased with us. God must be shaking His finger at us.
Take God at His word. Don't interpret events through negative emotions.
Take God's word and believe it. Realize it is true. Realize there is no agenda in them. What God says He will do. What God says He is, He is.
And be gentle with those who love you. Even when they mess up they very well might be trying their best.
Love "bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things." 1 Corinthians 13:7