I broke my favorite coffee cup. I think it is my fourth one this year -- maybe fifth.
It wasn't my favorite because it had special significance. It wasn't a gift from a loved one. It didn't have some memory attached to it.
It was my favorite because I liked how it felt in my hand and I liked the thickness of the side where my lips touched when I drank. And when a mug passes my rigorous qualifications it becomes the mug I drink my coffee out of all the time (not tea or hot chocolate -- no way will I share my favorite mug with a different beverage .....it might change my coffee flavor and that is a no-no in Jane's world).
So this morning I have had to use a less-than-ideal mug for my coffee. But I'll get an ideal one soon -- maybe even today. I hope to go to Eagle Butte to pick up one of my son's medications if it is in. Then I'll stop at the Family Dollar Store and find a perfect mug.
Why share this with you?
Not to tell you how clumsy I am (and I am).
Not to hope that you will send me a mug (please don't).
But to talk about the idea of something broken.
My 16 year old son who I have mentioned many times is a full-care teenager. He needs assistance with everything. And he has lots and lots of seizures. He takes seizure meds and he has a vagus nerve stimulator but he still has seizures. I have asked God why He can't at least take Hawk's seizures away. I mean, man, my son deals with so much. He has to be fed and changed like an infant. He cannot talk. He cannot walk. He has to be carried everywhere or pushed in a chair. So why does he have to have seizures on top of all that? Just doesn't seem right. I mean, what do the seizures accomplish? When he has had an EEG done, the electrical activity in his brain is all over the place. It's amazing he can even function as well as he does. He 's great at rolling around and sometimes he makes the happiest noises!
Anyway, again this morning I was praying about it because he had a particularly nasty seizure in the car while we waited for the Lantry post office to open up. And as I prayed a thought came to mind, "You could try the ketogenic diet."
The ketogenic diet is similar to the Atkins diet but has been around a whole lot longer than the latter has. It keeps a person in ketosis which somehow helps the body be seizure-free (or very well near it). Several years ago I had Hawk on this diet and he did well. We took him off because a friend of mine didn't realize he couldn't eat circus food and fed him cotton candy. While she was feeding him I saw how much he enjoyed it (and there are so few things he enjoys). So we stayed off it.
Today wasn't the first time I've heard "ketogenic diet" after praying about Hawk's seizures. I've had the ketogenic thought in my head for months now whenever I prayed about Hawk being seizure-free.
Do you know what I was doing? Pushing God's suggestion away. It's easy to do this at first because you can say it is you saying whatever you don't want to listen to. But God is patient and will continue to bring that suggestion to mind. And if you are tuned in, eventually you'll figure out it was God speaking all the time.
That's what I figured this out this morning.
I didn't listen before because the ketogenic diet means Hawk won't get any more of his favorite treats -- chocolate covered mini donuts, peanut butter M & Ms; any kind of M & Ms really.
I guess I had to break like my favorite mug. I'll get a new favorite. And Hawk will get some new favorite treats -- his mom just has to be creative.
When you hear the Voice, listen and do what It says. God knows everything. He knows what makes your heart beat faster. He knows your dreams. He knows your desires. He knows what will bring you joy. Listen. Anything you have to give up will be well worth whatever He leads you too.
"And I will keep watch to see what He will speak to me" Habakkuk 2:1b